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12/28
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9/27
Grand Opening! Welcome to the Site!
Harry Potter:"Do you really think there's going to be a war, Sirius?"
Sirius Black: "It… feels like it did before."
TURN ON THE LIGHT is a Post- Potter roleplay that takes place twenty-five years after the Second Wizarding War.
We welcome canon and original characters in this (currently) sandbox style roleplay.
“Naww why? Ah like yer nerdiness and interest in silly things,” he said in a heartfelt tease while reaching up to squeeze his friend’s cheek like a grandmother during Christmas dinner. Fair Maxwell was fairly drunk right now as alcohol was his way of getting through a hard time. So it might just come across as a drunk slur. But weren’t drunk people the most honest?
“Should have gotten a hold of dreamless sleep potions,” he mumbled to himself. Max didn’t keep them because they had become addictive to the point his body almost seemed to grow resistant. Which was dangerous in times he desperately needed them after being unable to sleep for days.
“Of course out of everyone you’d know, you know me like no other,” he grinned and elbowed his buddy in the waist like he used to while they were teenagers. Noticing some awkwardness as he was snuggling closely to his friend, Maxwell moved up and grinned sheepishly. “Sorry ‘bout that. Ah tend to crave physical comfort after-” A traumatic experience. Because seeing his best friend accepting his death head on was certainly that. Perhaps it was even more terrifying than the fact that Teddy almost got killed. Maxwell was good at stopping killers but he wasn’t a star when it came to mental stuff. You’d think after everything he’d been through he had gotten used to hurt but each time life decided to test him in a different way.
“Fair enough.” Time seemed to be one of the reasons but his own biggest concern was being declared unfit for the auror work because of his PTSD and who knows what else they’d find. Without his job, Maxwell wouldn’t know what was left for him. So he refused to go. That and he didn’t want to get confronted with stuff he refused to admit.
“Thank you,” he whispered softly as his head bobbed before resting it on Teddy’s shoulder. A deep breath let him take in the other’s warmth and the sense of safety he felt. Maxwell usually was a night owl that could stay up and guard forever. Unfortunately a full moon had recently passed and it really wore him down. Especially since his wolfsbane didn’t seem to work properly in combination with the other substances he regularly took. It showed in his fresh, still healing scars on his neck that revealed as his half long hair brushed away due to the movement.
Fighting a downhill battle against his eyelids, he tried to stay awake as long as possible. He wanted to talk with Teddy some more. But he didn’t even know what to say as the usually boorish shameless man found himself in a strange bashful moment. The words Teddy spoke brought a pink color to his ragged face. The kiss on top of his head reanimated a fluttery feeling he had considered lost. This was bad, very bad. Because Maxwell knew what this meant. Had Teddy been someone he was hooking up with would this be the point he ghosted. Maxwell couldn’t have romantic feelings involved. They lead to nothing but hurt. This was going to be a challenge; being there for his friend while keeping enough distance to emotionally get over whatever was blossoming right now. He had to kill it off quickly for both their sakes. They’d been over this in school, this shouldn't be happening now.
Post by THEODORE SILVESTRI on Jan 2, 2023 0:11:45 GMT
Teddy's cheek was warm when Max playfully pinched it. They could blame it on coming down from adrenalin and not the physical contact - if they needed to justify it. "That makes one person out of how many witches and wizards? A billion?" A gross overestimation but hey, he was tired and he felt his point (jokey as it was) was made regardless. "I guess that I'll just count myself lucky that you still kind of like me after all of these years." Smiling weakly at his friend Theodore shifted a bit into the back of the couch getting more comfortable as his body began to finally relax and give in from the night's events. As much as he wanted to protect everyone, just like always, his body and soul were tired and needed to recharge. Even so, something was nagging at him. Something Maxwell had said - even innocently.
"Do you, uh, mean that?" He asked quietly, his words breaking through the silence of the room other than a nearby ticking clock, their breathing, and Leah's soft snores. "Do you, still, uh... like me?" There was a double meaning to his question and he knew that Maxwell probably wouldn't know. Even so, he had to ask. He just couldn't help himself. "Even with... everything?" Maxwell's marriage, the fights, the falling off the grid, the cries, and tonight... could they still be friends? Friends, yes because surely they couldn't be more. Teddy was straight after all. Very straight. Certainly not pining for his best friend since he was a teenager. Too much time had passed anyways. Max had moved on. Teddy wasn't his type. Teddy wasn't... anything.
"Do you make a habit of that?" Theodore looked down at Maxwell's head on his shoulder, concerned. "Dreamless potions I mean..." It hurt him to know that something ailed Max so badly that he couldn't allow himself to dream. He deserved nothing but the best dreams. "Maybe you'll be okay tonight." Unlikely. Still, he had to help. "I'll be here... so nothing bad can happen right? Cause I'm still here, Max." He had almost died tonight, sure. But Max had saved him and Leah. Maybe this was how Teddy could pay him back. They were always paying each other back.
"It's okay, Max." He wished that he could believe him even though everything was so far beyond ok that it bordered on ridiculousness. He enjoyed the closeness of them together, the quiet, the feeling of the weight of his head on his shoulder, how his sides moved when he breathed or shifted ever so slightly. It had been so long since they had been like this. Where Max didn't want to have dreams Teddy craved them because until this moment it was the one memory of the two that he wanted to think about at night when he was all alone and the lights were out. He missed this. He missed him.
Dark hazel eyes noticed the scarring and his brow furrowed. "Max... What happened?" He couldn't help but ask. Sure Max was exhausted, they both were, but he didn't remember those marks and he swore that they looked familiar as though he had seen them in a textbook ages ago. "Is this... new?" He inquired his fingers hovering over it as if to gently touch and caress but denying himself that and tucking at Max's side once more.
The auror shrugged at the question laid on the table by the chaster. “Why? You care more about the opinion of a billion strangers over the opinion of your friend?” An eyebrow was arched and he’d let Teddy pounder upon that one for a while. Snuggling a little closer, careful not to wake Leah, he glanced up at the other man. “I’m grateful we got to meet again,” he said softly, almost relieved. Because at times he hadn’t been sure if he would have made it out alive.
“Of course Ah do. Ah wound’t be sittin’ here cuddlin’ all up to you if Ah didn’t, right?” Max said rather bluntly immediately the moment Teddy dropped the question. In fact he was the one surprised that someone as stable as Teddy still wanted to spend time with the shit show called Maxwell McCree. He still hadn’t told Theodore about the day before his wedding when he erased their conversation. Afraid his friend would hate and fear him. Such a selfish and unfair decision. Teddy deserved a better friend.Maxwell felt like he should let the other go to save him. Staying in touch with someone like Max would eventually eat away at Teddy. The Texan Cowboy was a self destructing mess who would drag people down with him even if he didn’t want to. The problem was; Maxwell needed Teddy to keep him on track. Someone to live for which was much harder than dying for someone.
His face hardened the moment Teddy asked about the dreamless potions. It almost felt like he was caught red handed. If Teddy took a good look at his friend, he might find Max with an embarrassed look on his face. “Ah’m tryin’ to cut down on ‘em,” he said almost in a defensive way. “Yeah, maybe,” he mumbled when Teds suggested nothing might happen because he was here. Still Maxwell reached into his pocket and threw his wand on the coffee table, away from direct reach. His gun had already been cleared up when they arrived. Just for good measure. He oh so hoped that Teddy was right but he didn’t want to end up waking up from a nightmare with a wand pointed at his friends.
Out on the streets, the auror was the one saving lives and keeping people safe. But here inside it was him seeking a sense of security from his beloved friend. Teddy’s scent smelled like home, Ilvermory days that seemed like beautiful fiction. Even Though those days hadn’t always been rose colored themselves. People tended to hold on to the happy days. He slowly fell asleep, comfortably taking in the other man's warmth.
His eyes flung open the moment he sensed fingers hovering above his heck. Immediately he moved his collar up to cover the scar. He would have told Teddy eventually but it never seemed the right time. Even now what in theory would be a good moment, Maxwell couldn't get himself to. "Now, now. Tryin' to undress me are ya?" He said teasingly, slipping into his flirty nature. "Do ya miss seein' me naked?" Why couldn't Max just be honest and tell him? Teasing Teddy was just a cheap way out. Because he knew how his friend tended to respond to this kind of behavior. Max knew he couldn't stay silent about it forever. But he was afraid of losing his friend.
Post by THEODORE SILVESTRI on Jan 19, 2023 19:25:37 GMT
"No..." As much as Teddy wanted to get defensive about the statement his body and heart were too tired to truly bicker. As a result, his response was less than convincing (even for to him). "I just..." How could he make Max understand? Maxwell had always marched to the unique tune of his own drum uncaring of what others thought and seemingly proud of what and who he was. Theodore was more reserved, more aware, more.... always waiting for the other foot to drop. In some ways they evened each other out. In other ways, they managed to question everything that they had come to know until they had met the other. Now was one of those plentiful times.
"I just think how people see you is important." That didn't sound as good nor as convincing as he would have liked it to be. Better try again. "Like, if nine people out of ten think that you're a jerk, chances are you're probably a jerk and that tenth person is probably a jerk along with ya." A tired chuckle at that remark left him as he tilted his head back on the couch cushion 'admiring' the ceiling. "Appearances matter, Max..." He sighed, resigned to that fact even though it depressed him. "Whether we want them to or not." Theodore was more of the latter.
Theodore began to count the cracks in his head, noting that it could probably do with another coat of paint. Otherwise, the place looked pretty clean and up to date. Maxwell had done well for himself Teddy noted and a part of him hurt at that. How much had he missed in his friend's life? Purchasing a place, making it nice, conversations, and moments of quiet like this one. So much had slipped away no matter how badly he wished to grasp onto it like a kitten clawing curtain as it dangled because it had tripped along the climb. And Max's confession about missing him was the greatest trip of all.
Theodore turned to look at Max, unable to fully mask the surprise that overtook his gaze at the admission. Blinking he allowed it to settle over him like warm water. Comforting in a way but if he basked too long in it, it would be dangerous. "I am too." No lies detected. No truer words had been spoken in a long, long time. And it was for that reason that Max's response about the potions he was taking had him sitting up. He tried not to be intimidating but his nurturing and overly protective nature was kicking in, tiredness be damned.
"They're dangerous, Max. You shouldn't take them at all. They can be highly addictive." Or so he had read. He didn't wish that for his... friend? When Max tossed his own wand Teddy instinctively leaned forward pulling it closer to them on the coffeetable. A simple action but one that demonstrated how different the two truly were. "It's a gateway to-" When he turned to look down at Max he knew instantly he was out. Good. He needed to rest. Teddy could finish his lecture in the morning. Or perhaps he spoke to soon, for at the tracing of his pal's scar Max was up again.
"I... I'm sorry... I was just..." Just what? He didn't even know. His face turned bright red at the naked comment. Max always knew just what curve ball to throw at him to forget his reasoning. It always worked. "Knock it off, McCree... Silvias is right there." He nodded toward the sleeping red head, clearing his throat with an awkward cough and turning his gaze away.
"Just…?" Maxwell tilted his head and looked at his friend. Teddy was so different from him. He wanted to understand him so he could support his friend better. Besides Maxwell's personality got him in a lot of problems. Perhaps it was time to learn from his friend if it wasn't too late.
"Is that so?" Maxwell wondered and took a moment to think about those words. A moment later he almost jumped up if it wasn't for Leah sleeping. "Hey! Ah'm not a big old nerd who does things like read, and listen to indie muggle music, and math. Well Ah do like indie music, but I also love Dolly but that's not the point." This probably wasn't the point Teddy was trying to make either. But from what Teddy said it sounded to Max like it was.
Of course it sucked thay society held specific standards on appearances. His own younger brother who wasn't considered 'traditionally attractive' had really suffered because of it. Unfortunately Max was just a single guy who didn't possess the power to change society. But he could try to make Teddy feel better about himself. “You’re lucky to have pretty privilege, that makes having nerdy hobbies just quirky,” he shrugged. While he wished he could have said something different, this was reality wasn’t it?
He wished he could have been a better friend. A better friend in general. There was so much that Teddy didn’t know yet but Max wasn’t sure how to bring those things up. How did one casually tell his best friend he obliviated his memories the day before the wedding? Or that one was a werewolf now, has been for a while actually. They weren’t things Max wanted to think about. Silence made them seem less true.
“Ah know, Ah know,” he waved away Teddy’s warning, half asleep already. Little did his friend know it was a step down from what he used to use in his twenties. Yet another rabbit hole he didn’t want to dive into. He wanted to be honest and tell Teddy why they should put a distance between them. It was to protect Teds. It was just that Max was a very selfish person and he needed his friend by his side. Someone to keep him on the right track.
“Shhh keep your voice down, you’ll wake her up,” he held his index finger in front of his lips. Tilting his head when the other turned away, Max chuckled softly. “It does take me back... Simpler times,” he sighed, wishing he could turn back time.
Post by THEODORE SILVESTRI on Feb 6, 2023 19:27:54 GMT
"I mean, everybody loves Dolly so that's not saying a whole lot." Teddy teased his best friend quietly. Who didn't adore Dolly Parton? Muggle or not Theodore was certain if you were somebody who didn't like Dolly Parton you could not be trusted. Luckily, Maxwell could be... or so Teddy thought. Or maybe he hoped. God, he hoped so badly and fully.
"Pretty privilege?" Theodore repeated the phrase with confusion in his voice. Yuck, the words even felt gross on his tongue. He hated himself for even entertaining it. "Did you take a spell to the head tonight?" He shook off the remark. While others may have found the professional chaser handsome (he had unwillingly been featured on his fair share of magazine covers) Teddy didn't see himself that way. Not at all. He was just an average guy doing his job. In a lot of ways he still felt like the nervous of messing up, nerdy boy at Ilvermorny just trying to survive each day. He couldn't have done it without the man next to him. And he knew now, even if just to himself, he didn't want to let another day go by mad at him. Life was too short. Tonight had proven that.
Theodore smiled weakly at his friend hushing him. There was so much that he wanted to say. So much that he wanted to do. But ever a man of restraint and control (or at least that's what he convinced himself of) he did not. He remained where he was, sitting, resting, and watching the man beside him. Relishing the moment. How his head felt resting on his shoulder, the other man's weight and trust in him, to be close, his warmth, how he felt tucked beside him so cumbersome in his burliness and yet so perfect. Merlin, Teddy swore he felt fuzzy. Perhaps it was his body coming down from the adrenalin. It had to be. He couldn't allow it to be anything else. That wasn't fair to him, to Max, to any partner he may have now. Never Teddy. It could never be. Not for any real reason but for the thousand made up ones that he had created to keep the other boy (and more importantly himself) at arm's length and in check.
"Max... I..." But the words once again wouldn't come out. Maybe that was for the best. Sighing, resolved to the fact that he was never meant to feel these things or even attempt to be happy he rested his head against the top of Max's. "Nevermind. Just rest. Ok?"
“Well everyone better frickin’ love the country queen. Anyone who doesn’t does not have a soul,” he huffed, a proud Dolly Parton fan. If Teddy was about to say he didn’t like her music, they could no longer be friends. Yes, it was that serious.
After hearing Teddy say the word out loud, Maxwell cringed and decided he hated the word. That was the last time he was going to use words said by hip young people. “Might have,” he chuckled sheepishly. “But you do know you’re a handsome dude, right?” How blind would Teddy be for not noticing the amount of fangirls and fanboys he had? It wasn’t just his Quidditch ability that gained him those.
A small moment of silence followed even if there was a lot still left to be said and done. Maxwell selfishly wanted to preserve this moment. It was never a good time to tell Teddy, was it? How much longer would he hide things until Teddy would find out and end up hating him. Funny thing was he’d probably be more upset about Max hiding things from him than anything else. He parted his lips to speak; “Teds, there is-” It was then when he felt Theodore’s head rest on his. His cheeks glew as did the rest of his body seem to cover in a warm fuzzy blanket.
“Hmm?” He hummed but snuggled closer when told just to rest. “We need to talk later but let’s rest for now,” he mumbled, his lips almost brushing the other man’s neck from their current position.
